by BCMS Staffing Services Employees
In this column, we frequently
describe why it’s best for physicians
and medical practice managers
to hire an outside staffing service
to handle their employment headaches.
Headaches don’t even begin to describe
what you’ll read in these tales.
Following are some funny, weird
and downright scary stories from the
world of employee staffing. Contributors
include BCMS Staffing members
Karen Collier, Paola Delgado,
Kerry McFadden, Jennifer Ramones,
Kim Rehm, Joanne Santa Cruz and
Jeanmarie Traversi. Enjoy:
A friendly, attractive Registered Nurse
came to us fresh from a job she’d just
quit at a San Antonio medical practice.
I was doing a routine criminal back-
ground check on her when up popped some outrageous
details. This candidate was a fugitive in not one, but two
West Coast states. On the background check, it stated that
her hair was brown. In person and on the driver license she
handed me, her hair was blonde. As her background check
continued to print out, it turns out she’d been busted for
forgery and theft in a third state. Needless to say, this candidate
was inactivated immediately.
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I was recruiting for a Physician’s Assistant and had an
excellent candidate who was scheduled to come in for
an afternoon interview.
She called that morning to reschedule, saying her babysitter
was sick and she had no one else to take care of her 5-
year-old daughter. I told the candidate that under normal
circumstances bringing a child to an interview was not
allowed, but since time was of the essence I would allow it
and try to expedite the interview process.
When she arrived for her interview, I brought in an extra
chair for the little girl and we got started. As the interview
proceeded, the little girl busied herself by holding her own
conversation on her toy cell phone. She seemed to tune us
out until I asked the PA, “Are you allergic to latex?” That’s
when the five-year-old looked up at me and said, very seriously, “No, she is allergic to kitties.”
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When the hiring manager called a candidate, she asked
him to bring several copies of his resume and three references.
He called back an hour before the interview and
asked to reschedule, saying, “My references can't come with
me to the interview today.”
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Another interviewer asked a candidate to describe his
ideal job. His response: “I don't know; I haven’t had it yet.”
When asked what motivated him and made him happy,
he replied, “I’ve got a big house, a big car and a big credit
card balance. Pay me and I’ll be happy.”
When asked what he wanted to be doing in his next position,
he said, “I’ll tell you what I don't want to be doing -
sitting in boring meetings, doing grunt work and having to
be nice to people all day long.”
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A scary looking man arrived for his appointment at the
front desk. He was 6’5” with a full beard and mustache,
wrap-around earrings in both ears and a large ring on his
right hand shaped like a skull.
I handed him the paperwork, explained everything to
him and took his driver license and social security card.
As he was filling everything out, I ran his criminal background
check.
His background check came back with information that
confirmed the scary vibes he gave off. He had been convicted
of assault and bodily injury — domestic violence against
his wife. I printed out the information and went to the back
office to ask for advice. When I returned to the front, he was
on his cell phone outside the door. All of the sudden, he
started jumping up and down. Then he burst through
the door and said he’d gotten an offer from a firm
where he had applied. He thanked me for helping him
and said he was going to take the position and not to
worry about his application with us. I congratulated
him and wished him good luck. Whew! What a relief
not to have to tell him he failed his background check
due to his record of domestic battery.
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One job applicant told me about an interview from Hell.
She’d responded to an ad for an at-home teacher. The
employer's assistant called and explained her employer was
the daughter of a multi millionaire…and kind of eccentric.
The applicant took an hour to drive to the interview,
expecting to spend about an hour being interviewed. After
an hour, the rich lady decided to show the applicant her
farm 20 minutes away. At the farm, the applicant was surpried
to see it stocked with unusual animals. The lady said
she wanted to recreate “Noah’s ark.” Finally, back at the
house the woman decided she wanted the applicant to be
the kids’ nanny, not their teacher.
The rich lady showed the applicant the nanny's room —
right off the kid’s playroom. The “room” was the laundry
room, furnished with a hard cot and a toilet right next to
the washer. All the while, she was still talking about her
house in Mexico, the land in California, the condo in
downtown Chicago and the month long trip in Africa they
planned to take. After three more hours when they finally
sat down to talk specifics, the applicant was stunned to hear
the pay she was offering was only $7.50 an hour. The applicant
left without turning back.
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A posh office called us asking for a front office person.
We had a person with excellent skills, but a less than professional
appearance. The staffing coordinator coached the
employee by asking her to report wearing her best outfit
because it was a very elegant office. The employee showed
up in her white formal wedding gown.
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I once fired a man from an assignment. He angrily
returned to my office with his four menacing big brothers to
confront me. The biggest and meanest brother said in a very
loud voice, “You fired our brother and we’re here to get him
back his job.”
I thought I probably was toast anyway, so I decided not
to cower. I stood up at my desk and hollered back at him,“Your brother showed up drunk on the job!” They turned to
him in unison and said, “You did WHAT?” The brothers
picked him up by the collar and ushered him out of my
office…and life. Whew!
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I worked for months on an account and finally got my
first order for an accounting clerk. This was a large, conservative
company’s headquarters office. We had interviewed
an excellent candidate, whose references checked
out perfectly.
This very conservative, professional looking candidate
was ready to start the following Monday. Over the weekend,
however, the candidate celebrated her new job by getting a
very large, pierced nose ring. I called the client Monday
morning bright and early to see just how much they loved
this new candidate.
In answer to my question, “How is Jenny doing?” I got
blasted with, “How could you send us a candidate with a
RING in her nose?” My response was a meek apology and, “Didn’t you ask to have someone who you could lead
around by the nose?” The client said, “Very funny! Now get
rid of her.”
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One time I had to counsel a nurse for showing up on the
job with one shoe on. Mind you she had to park in a parking
garage to get to work. She said she didn’t realize her
shoe was gone till she got to work.
Another nurse called in to cancel, not because she was
sick, but because she had to go grocery shopping and that
was the only day of the week she could go.
